Update: Wednesday, July 11. – I’m in awe of the Internet Peoples (that’s Quinnlin’s term for you all) and for what they gave to J and her sons to help protect them. Just this morning she texted me that the goal of $1500 was surpassed. She’s stunned and overwhelmed with gratefulness, as you might imagine. Some days I’m not so sure about this here internet because of some behavior online, but then something like this happens and it makes the world not seem connected by compassion.
Thank you for showing compassion to my friend and her sons through your donations and prayers and wishes for a good outcome on Friday. I’m eternally grateful. I know many of you are invested in her story and will share what happens on Friday. Still needing good thoughts and prayers and butterfly kisses for her and the boys.
“Julia, The agency says my life is in danger. They said they’ve never seen someone in as much danger of being murdered as me.”
Those are actual words from my friend J late one night when I picked up the phone. We’d met some 5 years ago when I got a call through the PKD Foundation from a mom who was pregnant and suspected of carrying a boy with ARPKD, the same the disease my kids have. I supported her as best I could through phone and email and a few months later she gave birth to a baby not suspected to survive. He did.
We became close during midnight phone calls discussing the struggles she faced with her new baby with special needs and the growing concerns for her middle child. During those calls she confided with me that she was in trouble. Her then husband was becoming increasing abusive. Home life was chaotic. We’ve talked about her and the kids’ safety numerous times and through it all the kids have suffered greatly. After a particularly horrific event that culminated in him hurting the kids and police being called, he was removed from the home and she began working with several agencies to protect her and her kids through any legal path she was afforded.
She’s done everything they’ve told her to do. She’s documented the kids’ dad’s behavior, play investigator for the agencies, she’s appeared in court when she was supposed to and she has met every obligation the courts have asked her to including the kids’ excruciating supervised visits with their dad. They’ve been visit-free for months and doing really well. She just wants to keep it that way.
J is now single mom to three boys, two of whom have significant special needs. She’s attending nursing school to build an independent life for her and her sons. For the past three years, with the support of family, she’s fought through the court system for her divorce and the assurances that their dad wouldn’t be able to cause further damage to the kids. She is in the final stages of the fight, with this Friday’s court date – July 13 – looming, she is short the funds her attorney needs to clear up a portion of what she owes.
Many court sanctioned appointments, hearings and continuances and psychotherapy for J and the boys are culminating this Friday. With the back child support amount growing and not being paid and her legal fees looming, I am asking for financial help for her.
The additional $1500 is owed on the $4500 bill her attorney wants cleared before Friday (court dates have already been postponed since February) in order to go to court with her. She is almost there. Without our help, she will walk into court alone. Crucial witnesses are scheduled to appear and testify on the boys’ behalf, including the attending psychiatrist who admitted one of the boys to receive hospitalization for stabilization last summer, and the school principal who has seen both scenarios of the boys’ exposure to their dad. The primary goal this Friday is to ensure that supervised visits with their dad remain nonexistent and certainly to prevent even a timeline for reunification between him and the boys.
I am trying to help her raise $1500 in two days, Thursday, July 12th
She is desperate. I just couldn’t sit by and not help her. I’d give her the $1500 if I had it so I asked her if I could help her this way. If you can spare any amount to help my friend in the fight to keep her boys protected please do. It’s just 60 people giving $25 each.
If you aren’t able to, please send good thoughts, wishes and prayers to this Friday and her attempts to provide another layer of protection about her boys. If you can help, leave a comment or email me and I’ll provide her paypal account address to you directly. If you’d like to offer support through comments please do as she can use any and all of those you can give.
Thank you my village, my friends, my Internets people.
5:45pm EST – J is at nearly $900 towards the past legal fees to keep her boys safe. Thank you! From J, “I don’t even know what to say because I didn’t think this could be possible. I am just so overwhelmed. I thought I would be going into court alone. I also feel like this is giving me a whole new group of people to pray for us and think about us.”
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